Formula of Friendship Forever

Formula of Friendship Forever

It isn't difficult to make friends .What is difficult is to maintain friendship. Many of us go through life meeting and loosing friends and then concluding that there aren't any true friends in this world. In my humble experience it is so because
most of us are I-Experts. I want this, I think this, I believe this, I want you to do this etc. It is the fast lane to failure, unhappiness and loneliness in life. To change all this , and ride on the highway to happiness, I have shortcuts.Have a minute to spare ?.

so here is my

V Formula

From your conversation delete maximum Is and replace them with Vs. Got it ?

Look at this this way ........

now we give it a vertical flip ...

one

Two

Three

Use minimum of Me and maximum of We - to begin with in talk , and then thoughts too!

With friends talk : we will... , we want ...., we think.. , let us do like this ... , it's our idea ....

and just see the DIFFERENCE !!

My ' ACE ' Formula

It is always a dilemma how much truth we should tell a friend. If we always praise and not tell their faults we are rather an enemy then friend. Because we are indirectly approving harmful habits, attitudes, and actions. On the other hand if we point out mistakes, it leads to dislike and break off. I feel the right way is to

speak truth but with tact.

It isn't enough that you are saying the right thing, it's even more important that we say it , in a right manner, at right time, place and mood of the person. The way to give constructive criticism and friendly feedback is in three steps :-

A C E

First Appreciate :

Whatever the friend is, or has done, there is certainly some genuine aspect to appreciate. Do that.

Then Criticise :

Now point out the not so good aspects, don't twist the knife/eloborate, just state them.

Finally Encourage :

Always end by encouraging "You are good", "You did well ", "You have a great future ahead"

Miss any step, or the sequence and we may loose a friend, try this way, it builds solid bonds.

My ' SPACE ' Formula

CANYOUPLEASEREADTHISENTENCEANDTELLMEHOWDOYOUFEEL?

Get my point ?

When we love and care for someone we become too protective. We want to know every thing, including what our friend thinks or feels, we want to decide always what is best for friend, we want to be together all the time, it becomes suffocating and unbearable. I think consciously we should give gaps. Certain things we don't ask or enquire in to, certain areas we don't poke our nose in to, certain problems we suggest no solutions, certain times we be away ( to rejoin later).

The Space improves the pace of friendship, admiration, and longing for each other many folds !!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Abstract from blog of Raj ji.